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Dispatches from the Highlands

Printed bi-monthly in CANNAPAGES Print directory
News from CannaTown
April 17, 2021
$4.20 Cents

Album Notes - Yeah Sure - Sasquatch Ain't Hidden

Erickson April 1, 2021

Move over The Wall. Make way Sgt. Pepper's. Step aside Ziggy Stardust. You've got company and it's called Sasquatch Ain't Hidden. Those legendary concept albums living in perpetuity are now joined by an equally cromulent tale revealing the discovery of Bigfoot. Saddle up as the narrator chronicles his chance encounter with the elusive bipedal and the hilarity that unfolds…

Terrible Crappy Boat Finally Sails Again

Dispatches March 30, 2021

The SS Shitface, a shitty, run-down shrimping boat that became wedged in the Susie Q Sandbar and nearly cut off traffic to indispensable “Free Hash Island,” has been finally refloated, authorities reported on Monday.

The crappy old trawler sailed north to the Great Hitter Lake in the east Highlands, and will now “technically” undergo an…

Album Notes - Jethro Tull - Aqualung

Erickson March 25, 2021

As you may have noticed, when a major anniversary of certain albums comes to pass, I use it as an opportunity to take a step away from the present-day and acknowledge brilliance, however many years after its creation. March 19 just so happened to mark 50 years to the day of the release of one of my absolute…

Genie: Wishing for More Wishes Must End

Dispatches March 25, 2021

After a serious of unfortunate wish transactions, local genie Shivvasnu The Great is in negotiations with area legal firm Waters & Steems, LLP to draft an exemption for the “Wishing For Other Wishes” loophole. 

“In this economy? It’s just not feasible,” Shivvasnu said. “This is a commission-based job and, after all this COVID bullshit? I’ve got…

Album Notes - Atlin Gün - Yol

Erickson March 17, 2021

A simple translation of the band's name divulges nothing more than "golden day." For those of us not versed in the source material, the story behind the music makes the results even more impressive: Dutchman travels to Turkey, immerses himself in Anatolian rock, becomes obsessed, returns to the Netherlands, recruits musicians (including two Turkish singers), forms band to recreate…

March Cannascopes

Dispatches March 17, 2021

CANNASCOPES : Discover Your Fortune!

Aries - You’ve developed some pretty bad stress habits since the lockdown started, but changing your tires is the worst one. 

Taurus - Sure, you were making a statement wearing sandals with socks. And that statement was, "I'm avoiding human interaction."

Gemini - You'll mistake the aromachologist's…

Album Notes - Ol' Burger Beats & Vuyo - Dialogue.

Erickson March 10, 2021

A Norwegian DJ and a Zimbabwean MC whose musical narratives are proffered by combining multiple Seinfeld references with voicemails from the rapper's sister that shed deeper insight into the family dynamics of their anti-apartheid activist father struggling to understand his children's artistic desires? By now you're probably sick of this hackneyed trope appearing in Album Notes, but I felt obligated…

Homemade 'Weetos' - Cannabis recipes from Cousin D

Cousin D March 4, 2021

Cheebo? Cheefo? You decide. Here is a somewhat easy recipe to make something that tastes a little like a homemade Cheeto, but dank and garlicky. We  couldn't decide on the best name! Weeto? This savory snack is easy to dose and scale, and even divide into gift bags for fellow home-bound friends. 

Meteorologist Out After Being Blamed For Terrible Storm

Dispatches February 20, 2021

Adam Driever, career meteorologist for local WRHO News on Channel 11 is out after being blamed for the worst storm in years. “This one was awful, it was historic and traumatic, and it’s all on Adam,” explained Lieutenant Ralph Bongatron in a press conference early Tuesday morning. “He’s been telling us it was going to be low nineties…

Album Notes - Hether - Sticky Thumb

Erickson February 16, 2021

In the wrong context, following H with ether sounds like either a flight to the heavens or a shortcut to the grave. But on Sticky Thumb, Hether supplies a 28-minute trip to lo-fi pop psychedelia. At this point it's worth noting that Hether is the solo project of Paul Castelluzzo, a twentysomething who has done everything from…

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