Expert review of user experience coupled with cannabinoid potency testing and weed pics of Armageddon

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CannaCritiques

Editorials and critiques of the best businesses and strains in the industry.

December 9, 2016
Denver, CO

No doubt most veteran connoisseurs will probably pack a bowl when they learn the world is about to end. A good candidate for such an occasion is Armageddon, an indica renowned for its floating relaxation. Quite appropriately, our sample was immersed in dense, fiery orange hairs. The amber crystal cover was accompanied by an earthy, Jolly Rancher apple aroma, heavy and dark. When ground, its chem tones turned slightly to clove and rum spice.

  The smoking result was a brilliant and vibrant spectacle. Critics enjoyed a thunderous cerebral plunge, as if going under and then back up to the surface to breathe. There was a great body right away - especially in the left wrist and upper legs, combined with a cloudy but remote head high. No paranoia ensued, but rather, eye-squeezing, pleasant vibrations.

  Two hits and we were set. But we weren’t drooling or locked to the couch. The body extended farther, numb but light, especially in the chest, abdomen, and legs. One reviewer remarked that it made the “perfect go-to, with well-rounded peaks and comforting descent,” and compared its versatility to a Robert Mondavi or Jameson Whiskey. “It was both intelligent, and elegant.”

  Armageddon makes a dependable staple for a steady strain rotation, ideal for Sunday afternoon softball, perhaps. It may also yield less on the creative side, being somewhat subdued, shy, withheld, lazy, pensive, and cautious all at the same time. A great distractor, one could find 100 different ways to waste their time, and rationalize it, even with major deadlines or the end of the world at hand. Duration carried about 2 hours.

  One reviewer said that she was a skeptic at first, wanting something even more cerebral, as if the dosage was a tease. But over time, she reported, the fogginess and general mind-numbness climaxed at satisfactory levels. It was difficult to physically move near the end, as both a permanent stare and pain-relieving lull cemented the muscles. If you wait until after dinner to enjoy Armageddon, expect to pass out within two hours; critics recommended a post-lunch puff.

Published on April 7, 2014
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