Dirty Taxi from Epic Remedy

Dirty Taxi from Epic Remedy

November 22, 2019

Little is known about Dirty Taxi, a very obscure and unknown indica-leaning hybrid from Epic Remedy that allegedly comes from a cross of GMO (Cookies) and Chem I95. The combination of starry-eyed euphoria and social psychedelia--served with a doubled-down essence of sour, diesel fuel flavor-- will leave you stumbling, if not planted firm in one place, dissolved in a hypnosis, with focus and mind running adrift. In other words, on a taxi ride to the abyss. 

   Our sample buds were vibrant, bright and furry little morsels, heavy in our hands like dead-weights and coated with crystals “like ice gathering on a freezing window.” Their scent was distantly pine, but broke to reveal a stronger-than-usual mothball aroma, like Grandma's coat closet. The organic earthiness reminded us of none other than a “New York City taxi, legitimately!" noted a critic, "Not a taste for everyone.”

   So, why so popular? Because we got ripped. Super ripped. It was an immediate game- changer and "body-snatcher." In seconds the first exhale pulverized like thunder, and an electric face buzzed out of control. With heads like fish bowls we struggled to stay balanced, to keep from tipping. That first five minutes seemed to last an hour. When finally our brains had reattached, the resulting calm was cheerful and intoxicating. 

   After a short while the heaviest psychedelic aftershocks faded and warmth swept through the body. Sharp muscle pain had lost its sting; movement became easier and much less uncomfortable. We were definitely not well-equipped for long-term exploration. “Don’t climb a mountain with it -- you won’t want to walk back down,” noted a critic “and hopefully someone will have brought snacks.” Zombified, focus was difficult at times--but easy to maintain focus once found--and epiphanies conjured conversation in long sporadic spurts. 

   It was difficult to find the right descriptor for this flower. “Potent-mind altering, body-locking, motivation-mutilating, thought-provoking, action-seizing, coma-copy cat of a strain,” one critic wrote. “Nice if you want to lay around and actually chill out!” said another. By time that chill wore off several hours later, those of us still awake were feeling way too lazy to spark the second half of the joint sitting nearby. Out of the abyss, and into cozy beds we crawled, grins intact.